11 Aug 1999

A Fall


Beaten again, but I’m not yet gone,
Still I hope, I dare to dream,
Keep on believing that life will smoothen,
Trusting that nothing lasts forever
Everybody does crouch when his day comes
And then stand upright once again,
And this will go on, like waves come in
We bend, we fall, we rise, we fly
The secret is when we acknowledge it all,
As an essential part of walking along.

7 Jul 1999

Flooded


Every drop of rain that drops thus,
Falls on my heavy heart with a sound
That resounds within this hollow self
To infinitely echo onto infiniteness

Tears from within and rain without
One can hardly distinguish between the two
Which one lays heavier upon my breast
Which one has drowned the passion in me?

I can only wait for the sky to clear
And the gloomy clouds to give way
Before I know the tears from the rain
And judge the weight of this unknown burden

Just passing clouds, will the depression pass?
Is there a wind within to blow it past?
Am I to wait for the skies to clear?
Or dig up and force out a sunny smile?

3 Mar 1999

Memories


I held a rose once in my hand,
That was slowly withering away
And no matter what I did to keep its colour
The shades kept fading away

I held on to the dried up remains
Of what was once enchanting my soul
I held on dearly to passing moments
That soon dried up into still pictures

And now I hold these dear dry flowers
And smile to see my past in them
As my memories blow back life in them
To cheer me with their colours again

Time speeds by a one way street
And I watch every young bud with trepidation
For I know it blooms only to wither
A passing romance that etches my heart

A helpless spectator I throw up my hands
A skeptical observer I fear to relish
This temporary beauty that wins and dies
While I live on to yearn and remember.


16 Feb 1999

At Crossroads with Fate


My fate, one road leads me one way
Your fate, your road leads you your way
I don't know if these roads will cross
I don't know if these roads should cross

And if by chance they do cross
Whether we collide in disaster or unite in fusion
I know not what should ideally happen
But trust that our fates know their roads
And the roads are laid out, planned before

For now my road is stony and rocky
With every rock reflecting your face on it
And my hopes rising at every turn I take
To find an empty stretch ahead again

Several others cross and go,
But none can fill the void you created
My road is rocky and every stone hurts
Reminding me of you, stirring my passions
Tenderly killing with loving memories
A joyous torture, ecstatic in itself

You make me cry, you make me writhe
You drive me to desperation, you scorch my palms,
Yet you give me a hope, a dream to dream
And thoughts and fantasies to get me through my day


The road is rocky, but I gladly tread it
The mystery making it even more thrilling
And I can always hope we'll cross our paths
For it is not guaranteed that we don't unite
Neither can we be assured we stay apart
Our fates unknown to one and all
The only knowledge that it know its course

I'll live as long as I can hope
And hence forever I'll walk my road
The rocks are hurting but triggering me on
And I breathe in your smile with every step I take

























3 Jan 1999

Its all Within You

Sometimes when I see, I don't see at all,
Sometimes I see gloomy clouds but not the flowers around
Sometimes the bright sunlight, blinds me to the thorns
Always have I failed to see, the true picture as it is

Sometimes I hear a birdie sing, though there are voices all around
Sometimes through soft melodious music, I hear thunder in my heart
And when I closed my ears I finally realized
I had actually been quite deaf all along

The songs I heard were in my heart
All melodies lay within my soul
And when I chose i could hear the sweetest tunes
And when I did not, I would hear noises around

Within us is the power to chose
What we see and how we feel
Within us is the strength to live
Though often we choose to use it not

When we let go, we are washed along
By nature's eternal flow
The course at times is stormy and turbulent
And at times relaxingly cool

Yet I know that if with complete faith
And a guiltless heart we close our eyes
We will finally drift ashore
But where, we cannot know before

So if you have a goal in mind
A place of haven you see in your dreams
Then use your will and pick the oars
To row your course through life